The Day That Was: June 1, 2007

We've been watching Gladiator on TNT, but they cut out all the good parts. No decapitations, no swearing... and worst of all, at least if you're Michael Vick, no tiger stabbing! Anyway, here's some highlights from a slow day in the sports world:

Zambrano and Barrett have a scuffle in the dugout



Antonio Tarver claims to have been drugged before Hopkins fight
Tarver also claims to have a line of highly successful indoor grill appliances.

Steve Kerr to be named new Suns President
Rumors of a Scottie Pippin return are no longer far-fetched.

Man named Bob L. Head to be turned into Bobblehead
Insert Dick Army joke here.

Joe Torre ejected as Yankees win in Fenway
Torre explained his 'bad boy' actions, saying "Hey, it gets A-Rod laid."

Gary Sheffield suspended three games for throwing a bat
Due to the bat missing its intended target of the umpire, Sheffield also received an error.

MRI reveals no break in Mickelson's wrist
Phil vows to join with Michelle Wie to form crimefighting duo The Psychosomatic Putter Pals.

We couldn't have said it better:

"Now I just get to follow the freak show."

- Randy Messenger on joining the Giants and Barry Bonds' home run race.